{"presentation":{"slides":[{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1438172043010755,"width":96.94989106753813,"height":92.47311827956989,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"

Writing a thesis can seem at first to be an insurmountable task...so lets break it down into manageable chunks!<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n\n

1. Macro-scale tasks<\/strong> (what to write about? who is the audience? what to include\/exclude? purpose and value to the reader? organization)<\/p>\n\n

2. Micro-scale considerations<\/strong> (editing, cohesive paragraphs, clearer sentences, and finally proofreading)<\/p>\n\n

<\/p>\n\n

Writer's Block? https:\/\/www.uc.utoronto.ca\/writers-block<\/a><\/p>\n\n

<\/p>\n\n

Don't forget to your Honours thesis manual from the Geography Department! It shows you sample layouts for chapters, lists of tables and figures, how to include figures, how to make tables, the usage of headings and sub-headings, etc.<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"48ce9c77-f5c3-4e97-b3c9-c360af728997","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{"fillSlideBackground":"#c5f4d5"}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.150537634408602,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":92.47311827956989,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"

\"Writers drive readers to boredom by being monotonous, predictable, repetitious, circuitous, or long-winded.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n

1. Your general philosophy. <\/strong><\/span>Boring! Persuasion Sales Value Utility Benefits <\/p>\n\n

2. General style.<\/strong><\/span> Long sentences. Impact. Cut and paste. (Mahrer 2000c)<\/p>\n\n

<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"7562d98c-6a6f-4acd-8069-dddf0a412f74","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":66.44880174291939,"y":90.32258064516128,"width":28.32244008714597,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f4063a041c3.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"b3fa4c0c-f2f4-4932-8edc-04e195740bd9","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":4.357298474945534,"y":30.598064516129032,"width":33.769063180827885,"height":65.3763440860215,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"Salesperson","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f4070e32318.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":600,"height":587}},"subContentId":"c343938c-495c-4229-afd0-bab8cff146e2","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":41.394335511982575,"y":36.55913978494623,"width":52.287581699346404,"height":43.01075268817204,"action":{"library":"H5P.TrueFalse 1.8","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"correct":"true","behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false},"l10n":{"trueText":"True","falseText":"False","score":"You got @score of @total points","checkAnswer":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgain":"Retry","wrongAnswerMessage":"Wrong answer","correctAnswerMessage":"Correct answer","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswer":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"

I would rather read a short, concise, and interesting paper than a long-winded boring one.<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"4beba15d-e9b6-4393-aec4-c31404ad3ad9","metadata":{"contentType":"True\/False Question","license":"U","title":"Untitled True\/False Question"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1303763440860215,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":58.064516129032256,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"

\"Readers don\u2019t like unnecessary complexity<\/strong>. <\/p>\n\n

\u2022 Place the action of a sentence in the verb and the purveyor of the action in the subject.<\/p>\n\n

\u2022 Place the verb as close to the subject as possible.<\/p>\n\n

\u2022 Do not place information randomly, but with old information preceding new information.\" (Mahrer 2004b)<\/p>\n\n

\"Next consider weight<\/strong>. <\/p>\n\n

\n\t

big words, too many words, and convoluted syntax\/explanations make science difficult to understand\"  (Mahrer 2001)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n"},"subContentId":"8f600ccb-c687-49e2-84de-1497aa75630e","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":70.80610021786492,"y":92.47311827956989,"width":28.32244008714597,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f408386260c.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"784e1c2a-1fc4-47fd-8b27-f9a987fed283","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":3.2679738562091503,"y":55.91397849462365,"width":20.250088594137598,"height":40,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"Royalty","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f408ec87f03.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":626,"height":626}},"subContentId":"7523e53c-b0ca-445a-869d-073ddc3c277c","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.133737634408602,"width":96.94989106753813,"height":94.62365591397848,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
\"Can you recall the papers you read last month? Probably not. You invested the time and have very little to show for it. It\u2019s not your fault. Chances are, from inception these papers were headed toward your personal recycle bin. Certainly not all published papers can be landmarks, but why are so many forgettable? It\u2019s probably not for lack of effort. Most papers spawn from major research efforts. It\u2019s not because of poor language. Substandard manuscripts either get rejected or are reworked until they reach a minimal level of acceptability. Maybe a few substandard ones get through, but most are acceptably written. And it\u2019s not because of shoddy science. Reviewers are good at rejecting substandard science. So, again, what makes published papers forgettable? Recently I found part of the answer. I was reading a paper, had come to the Conclusion section, and there was nothing to conclude. In place of a conclusion was a vague, generalized, five-sentence summary\u2014something I didn\u2019t need, because I had just read the paper; in fact, it deflated the paper. That\u2019s when it hit me: Memorable papers build to memorable conclusions. Memorable conclusions explicitly show readers value, i.e., things worth remembering. The paper I read had nothing to conclude because the authors never put the research into the reader\u2019s perspective. The authors equated their research with their paper, and left it there. That was a fatal mistake. Successful authors separate research and writing<\/strong>.\" (Mahrer, 2003)<\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"257493b9-55a5-4a8a-ba65-95b939de6230","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"slideBackgroundSelector":{},"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.150537634408602,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":38.70967741935483,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Ask yourself some questions. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n
Motivation <\/strong>- Why did you do this work? There must be a reason: a problem, a misconception, a weakness, something that warranted spending resources and gives your work real value. <\/p>\n\n
Audience <\/strong>- your readers, who are they? - others judge your work by its quality, originality, and utility.<\/p>\n\n
Action <\/strong>- what do you expect the readers to do after reading your paper?<\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"475563e4-6779-4481-93b1-7c267d2a102f","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":3.2679738562091507,"y":51.58258064516129,"width":44.66230936819172,"height":45.376344086021504,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"audience","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f40af8ebc6e.png","mime":"image\/png","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":313,"height":161}},"subContentId":"8b0b5d29-3b17-4178-a8d2-272bafcab16a","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":63.18082788671024,"y":92.47311827956989,"width":28.32244008714597,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f40b8e609b2.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"5d9aad79-6e48-474a-9ae5-284921ca7ef7","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":53.37690631808279,"y":40.86021505376344,"width":40,"height":40,"action":{"library":"H5P.TrueFalse 1.8","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"correct":"false","behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false},"l10n":{"trueText":"True","falseText":"False","score":"You got @score of @total points","checkAnswer":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgain":"Retry","wrongAnswerMessage":"Wrong answer","correctAnswerMessage":"Correct answer","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswer":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"
For your thesis, you should consider your \"audience\" as just your advisor.<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"9f0a94ec-f756-424d-a68f-632441e09fd8","metadata":{"contentType":"True\/False Question","license":"U","title":"Untitled True\/False Question"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}]},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1438172043010755,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":58.064516129032256,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
\"Distinguishing the purpose of research and the purpose of the paper<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
what you have learned, <\/p>\n\n
what you can conclude from your research, <\/p>\n\n
what you want readers to do after reading your paper.<\/p>\n\n
If you formed a valid purpose for your paper, write to verify, validate, while demonstrating that purpose. Don\u2019t write to just showcase your research.\" (Mahrer 2003)<\/p>\n\n
\"A successful report should point out or point the way to financially beneficial action or actions.\" (Mahrer 2000d)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"9a95549b-2d2a-4ed2-99fb-2f38c7feaa6b","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":77.34204793028323,"y":55.91397849462365,"width":20.250088594137598,"height":40,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"reading","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f40e357cf85.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":416,"height":416}},"subContentId":"eaf6fe43-a124-4bf1-a052-a2213d6c75ea","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":3.2679738562091503,"y":90.32258064516128,"width":24.074074074074076,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f40e48e3046.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"18f55472-fecb-4e12-b5f2-9e42be986929","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":6.438172043010752,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":36.55913978494623,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Theoretical or modeling work - <\/strong>Readers are interested in results and benefits. Put the details in an appendix.  <\/p>\n\n
If your text is more practical<\/strong>, Most of us would rather read an interesting, informative five-page article and scan a 10-page appendix than slog through all the details of a tedious 15 pager. (Mahrer 2002)<\/p>\n\n
Model assumptions <\/strong>- limitations, consequences, warnings...and your defence (Mahrer 1999)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"37412ac1-1d3c-4317-bf63-664ea7fa62bf","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":67.5363834422658,"y":38.924731182795696,"width":29.302832244008716,"height":56.98924731182795,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"computer","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f40cde8d881.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":284,"height":280}},"subContentId":"7dcd8bb7-e17f-4a71-8013-083c65cb96f3","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":5.446623093681917,"y":88.17204301075269,"width":27.342047930283226,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f40cfd1085a.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"c6f8d345-caad-4ffa-97b0-e44e271bef85","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0905125408942202,"y":2.1505376344086025,"width":38.05888767720829,"height":96.34408602150538,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"Steps for academic writing","title":"Steps for academic writing","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f2c0ac383a4.png","mime":"image\/png","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":679,"height":871}},"subContentId":"5f6621d3-590f-4b25-8c23-f5a35d0b9342","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":40.34896401308615,"y":90.51724137931035,"width":30.53435114503817,"height":6.25,"action":{"library":"H5P.Link 1.3","params":{"linkWidget":{"protocol":"https:\/\/","url":"drive.google.com\/file\/d\/11ei9SC99Fyz63diq6kpJ9j16TS_sI4AC\/view?usp=sharing"},"title":"Link to the PDF of this infographic"},"subContentId":"80e7e6c8-95a1-4e80-814b-be8a3566b94d","metadata":{"contentType":"Link","license":"U"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":44.66230936819172,"y":6.431440860215052,"width":54.46623093681917,"height":81.72043010752688,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
\"The goal of technical writing is not just to publish! No, it is to be read, understood, used, and archived. The mission of this kind of writing is to guide readers through the experience and findings of the author(s)\u2014not to force readers to repeat the experience. Hence, it is the mandate of all technical writers to meet the basic demand of the readers and this means simplify. ... <\/p>\n\n
As a technical writer, you are not a mystery writer and you are not a spy disseminating coded messages to a chosen few. You are a member of a club whose goal is to expand accessible, useful, and interesting information. What good is solving a problem if no one, besides you, can understand the solution?\" (Mahrer, 2005)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"361056d4-22a2-46ef-a763-9206a8f234d9","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":67.53812636165577,"y":75.26881720430107,"width":23.965141612200437,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f40f1b91a20.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"9a0de22a-fc6e-4b2c-af1e-2ef000efd6c9","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":0,"y":2.150537634408602,"width":99.1285403050109,"height":94.62365591397848,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
William Zinsser (adapted from On Writing Well: The Classic Guide to Writing Nonfiction, 25th anniversary edition, 2001):<\/p>\n\n
Clutter is the disease of American writing. We \u2026 strangle in unnecessary words, circular constructions, pompous frills and meaningless jargon. Our tendency is \u2026 inflate to \u2026 sound important. The airline pilot \u2026 announces that he is presently anticipating experiencing considerable precipitation and wouldn\u2019t dream of saying it may rain. The sentence is too simple so there must be something wrong with it. But the secret of good writing is to strip every sentence to its cleanest components. Every word that serves no function, every long word that could be a short word, every adverb that carries the same meaning that\u2019s already in the verb, every passive construction that leaves readers unsure of who is doing what\u2014adulterants that weaken sentences. And they usually occur in proportion to education and rank. ... It won\u2019t do to say that \u2026 readers are too dumb or too lazy to keep\u2026 If readers are lost, it\u2019s usually because writers have not been careful\u2026 Perhaps a sentence is so \u2026 cluttered that readers, hacking their ways through \u2026 simply don\u2019t know what it means\u2026 Perhaps Sentence B is not a logical sequel to Sentence A; the writer, in whose head the connection is clear, has not provided the missing link. \u2026 Writers must therefore constantly ask themselves: What am I trying to say? \u2026 Then they must look at what they have written and ask: Have I said it? Is it clear to someone encountering the subject for the first time? If it\u2019s not, some fuzz has worked its way into the machinery. \u2026 Writing is hard work. A clear sentence is no accident. Very few sentences come out right the first time or \u2026 the third. Remember this in moments of despair. If you find that writing is hard, it\u2019s because it is hard.<\/em><\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"5e522263-71d1-4008-adaa-64100cc9df2d","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":"
\"Despite these and the ranting of many noted authorities, today\u2019s writers still seem compelled to complicate their articles. Why do so many technical writers do this? My guess is that they don\u2019t listen to or discount the complaints (e.g., \u201cIt\u2019s not me, it\u2019s other writers\u201d) and\/or follow some type of convoluted syllogism (e.g., penetrability of writing is inversely proportional to complexity of topic; technical writing addresses very complex topics; therefore, technical writing necessarily produces text approaching impenetrability.) Whatever their syllogism, they all bleed unwarranted hubris. Impenetrability is a choice not a necessity. Readers of technical articles, a competent jury, constantly complain about published material that is unreadable. They are screaming that unreadability is not an unavoidable consequence of the science, but an avoidable consequence of the scientist. It\u2019s the author\u2019s duty to explain so thoroughly, so completely, as to simplify. If the author is not able to do this, then he or she (or they) is (are) not ready to publish!\" (Mahrer 2005)<\/p>\n"},{"x":53.37690631808279,"y":90.32258064516128,"width":25.05446623093682,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f40fe9c5942.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"fc15561a-f121-476a-9315-2e9e72134908","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0905125408942202,"y":1.9396551724137931,"width":98.03707742639041,"height":96.55172413793105,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Writing support at Lakehead University <\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/strong><\/span>We are here to help you from the planning to the publishing stage of your assignment! We are not<\/em> an editing service, but we are<\/em> here to guide you! Our writing coaches can help with the following:<\/p>\n\n
\n\t
discover what you're trying to say and how to say it<\/li>\n\t
develop an argument<\/li>\n\t
structure of your paper<\/li>\n\t
organization of ideas<\/li>\n\t
proper referencing and citation and provide resources for you<\/li>\n\t
self-editing skills<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n
One-to-one writing support is available through the Academic Support Zone by booking an appointment online at mysuccess.lakeheadu.ca with a Writing Coach. It is best to book an appointment well in advance of a due date. Writing appointments are designed to teach you skills, not edit your paper, and you need time to apply what you've learned! https:\/\/www.lakeheadu.ca\/students\/academic-success\/student-success-centre\/academic-support-zone\/tutoring#writing-support<\/a><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"5f83c9a7-c4f9-4df3-b0f2-a10ad601f2de","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":2.1810250817884405,"y":2.1551724137931036,"width":96.40130861504908,"height":34.26724137931035,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Writing resources at Lakehead University<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/strong> <\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span>- online documents for you to read<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
Ex. \"Self-Edit Your Paper\", \"Making the Sentence Accessible\"<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
https:\/\/www.lakeheadu.ca\/students\/academic-success\/student-success-centre\/academic-support-zone\/academic-resources\/writing<\/a><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"c84953e3-9124-4579-8d96-1b4f7542634e","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":2.178649237472767,"y":34.36817204301075,"width":39.21568627450981,"height":61.72043010752688,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"writing","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f4101e8a3bb.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":1600,"height":1276}},"subContentId":"bfab2308-3f67-4d64-ada0-227532295f1e","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":46.84095860566449,"y":38.70967741935483,"width":40,"height":40,"action":{"library":"H5P.TrueFalse 1.8","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"correct":"true","behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false},"l10n":{"trueText":"True","falseText":"False","score":"You got @score of @total points","checkAnswer":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgain":"Retry","wrongAnswerMessage":"Wrong answer","correctAnswerMessage":"Correct answer","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswer":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"
You can get live help (via Zoom) at any stage of writing via LU<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"916a3e39-54f0-45c7-84bb-48370fc3cbf1","metadata":{"contentType":"True\/False Question","license":"U","title":"Untitled True\/False Question"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":0.8467741935483872,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":70.96774193548387,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
The Abstract<\/strong><\/span> \"a concise, stand-alone, and terse summary of the new information in your paper<\/strong> \" (Mahrer 2000c)<\/p>\n\n
Here\u2019s what you should put into your abstract, nothing more, nothing less! Answer the following three questions in the order presented. Do not add anything else; do not stray, do not embellish, just the questions in a straightforward manner: <\/p>\n\n
1. What did you do?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
2. How did you do it?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
3. What did you learn that was not known before?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
That\u2019s it. Answer those three questions, in order, and you will have an acceptable abstract. Now be careful; answering may not be as easy as first appears.  <\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"27450004-45c7-4baf-a4c6-c97c4f6bcc06","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":6.5359477124183005,"y":90.32258064516128,"width":25.163398692810457,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f410d1154d3.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"de80b335-9c29-46b0-a39c-6c6b4814ee40","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":80.61002178649238,"y":66.66666666666666,"width":17.864923747276688,"height":31.39784946236559,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"an abstract cartoon","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f41157db71f.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":2160,"height":1920}},"subContentId":"a7cc6bfc-62c7-4f9d-8e59-a2857bd068ff","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":1.075268817204301,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":58.064516129032256,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
The Introduction<\/strong><\/span> <\/p>\n\n
\"(Readers want concise <\/strong>writing. Beating your chest by citing everything you\u2019ve read does not add value to your work, it only bores readers.) Are your introductions page after page of somewhat related material without focus<\/strong>? (Telling everything you know about a subject is not the path to a successful introduction.)\" (Mahrer, 2000c)<\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"The Definition is a reformulated Introduction. Instead of a clump of one or two-sentence summaries and citations, the Definition focuses the reader\u2019s attention by identifying and explicitly stating the problem that is being solved<\/strong>. The problem is not implied but specifically stated. In many documents this is not easy, but it is necessary because it immediately \u201chooks<\/strong>\u201d the reader: It says, \u201cHere is a specific problem that I\/we have solved or to which I\/we have found fresh new insight and which is important to you.\u201d This immediately persuades readers that they will receive value <\/strong>and utility<\/strong>\" (Mahrer 2000).<\/span><\/p>\n\n
(Mahrer 2000b)<\/span><\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"1bfb9969-a2a0-43a3-855a-dfa62374c919","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":3.2679738562091503,"y":88.17204301075269,"width":25.05446623093682,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f4138dc7476.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"5344008c-c806-4746-892b-47015d2081eb","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":84.9673202614379,"y":55.91397849462365,"width":11.10367311388586,"height":40,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"hook","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f414ba7706d.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":590,"height":1076}},"subContentId":"588bbbca-4d48-4990-8731-20bbf19fa624","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":9.803921568627452,"y":2.150537634408602,"width":76.25272331154684,"height":6.451612903225806,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Here\u2019s an example. Assume the authors have developed a new algorithm.<\/span><\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"8ad4185d-a682-405c-9731-9242db5e4af3","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":2.066318082788671,"y":9.663978494623656,"width":43.57298474945534,"height":66.66666666666666,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
TRADITIONAL PAPER<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"Such a paper typically begins by presenting existing literature on similar work. It then derives the new algorithm, followed by some examples of output. If the algorithm is faster or more accurate than existing algorithms, the speed difference or accuracy is usually mentioned in a sentence or two buried within the depths of the Results or Conclusion section. The paper can be a real struggle to readers, unless they\u2019re doing similar work. This is a classic writer\u2019s paper\" (Mahrer 2000)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"de392acd-a588-42bd-aa4a-5da62301e7eb","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":54.46623093681917,"y":9.879032258064516,"width":43.24618736383442,"height":68.81720430107526,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Definition, solution, benefits (DSB) Paper<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"Instead, at the beginning the writers should state explicitly that there is a problem with the slowness or inaccuracy (i.e., inadequacy) of the existing algorithms\u2014 otherwise why was this work done? In addition, to enhance value, details of the inadequacy should be given. Here is where the background reading summaries come in. All this helps define the problem, add value, and bring readers \u201cinto\u201d the paper. The algorithm can now be developed, because the reader is hooked\" (Mahrer 2000)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"3e314623-b1b8-46e6-9d52-87479a4465e5","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":79.52279569892472,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":20.43010752688172,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
\"There is room for some but certainly not all the background reading cited in the (old) Introduction. Perspective, background, and other ingredients of the Introduction can be included, but the key point of the Definition section is an explicit statement of the problem. This section must say to the reader, \u201cHere is an important problem to consider\u201d<\/strong> not simply \u201cLook what I read and studied.\u201d<\/em>\" (Mahrer 2000)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"81cc5c81-02fa-4b16-aafb-aaa09a4530bb","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.150537634408602,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":36.55913978494623,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Means\/Methods<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
Use appendices for dry details and keep the reader\u2019s focus with value and benefit. (Mahrer 2000c, Mahrer 2000)<\/p>\n\n
\"...directed toward giving the steps that lead to the solution of the defined problem\" (Mahrer 2000)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"34e1ffbc-4cca-4577-8a8c-66ad21c8cf96","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":51.19825708061002,"y":83.87096774193547,"width":27.233115468409586,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f41596cd608.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"513dcf69-5b30-46ac-a492-46c7c23615b6","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":3.2679738562091507,"y":31.492043010752685,"width":30.501089324618736,"height":64.51612903225806,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"solutions","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f41649b526d.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":1300,"height":1390}},"subContentId":"635bc087-7a80-4e76-96c7-abe1dcf14ca5","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":51.19825708061002,"y":25.77290322580645,"width":39.97821350762527,"height":45.16129032258064,"action":{"library":"H5P.TrueFalse 1.8","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"correct":"false","behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false},"l10n":{"trueText":"True","falseText":"False","score":"You got @score of @total points","checkAnswer":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgain":"Retry","wrongAnswerMessage":"Wrong answer","correctAnswerMessage":"Correct answer","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswer":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"
All of the equations I used and calculations I made must appear in the Means\/Methods section<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"fb4619c4-7281-4813-87ff-04cee95a4ea6","metadata":{"contentType":"True\/False Question","license":"U","title":"Untitled True\/False Question"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1303763440860215,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":27.956989247311824,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Results<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
A flood of figures? (Mahrer 2000c)<\/p>\n\n
Too short? Too long? Utility to the reader (Mahrer 2000)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"876fa080-a619-4f13-b04e-abc24635cc53","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":4.357298474945534,"y":88.17204301075269,"width":28.43137254901961,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f416ecc368f.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"bc8fbbb3-79a5-4daa-85af-2aab6f31932f","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":62.091503267973856,"y":46.51204301075269,"width":34.531590413943356,"height":49.46236559139785,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"flood","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f4173f1f9dc.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":612,"height":443}},"subContentId":"139c4dce-c217-44dd-906f-24806eb3ffb0","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.127015053763441,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":34.40860215053763,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Figures<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"...In sum: Cull down to only those figures that actively contribute. Know the purpose of each figure. Avoid redundant figures. Tie each figure directly and thoroughly to the body text. Keep the figures simple. See, it\u2019s not difficult; don\u2019t make it so. To paraphrase the ancients: A good figure is worth a thousand words, but ten poor figures aren\u2019t worth anything.\" (Mahrer 2002c)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"f021ccd3-9eeb-4f12-92ac-2c73c3132a46","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":21.78649237472767,"y":36.55913978494623,"width":54.241308734297135,"height":40,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"artists","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f418743f12b.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":600,"height":224}},"subContentId":"9981d813-0924-46b3-9692-40cc6c05f780","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":33.769063180827885,"y":86.02150537634408,"width":26.143790849673202,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f4188630575.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"9e891a95-33db-46be-b225-03cdb97b21a0","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1438172043010755,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":68.81720430107526,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Discussion\/Conclusion <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"Conclusions are not summaries. Why do readers need a summary? They just read the article. The conclusion makes the final sale; it cements the values, benefits, utility, etc. of your work.\" (Mahrer 2000c)<\/p>\n\n
\"In research, once results are compiled, conclusions are drawn\u2014maybe. It\u2019s obvious that for some work, conclusions are not drawn and the Conclusion section becomes a minisummary of the work. In other efforts, the writers draw and report conclusions \"(Mahrer 2000).<\/p>\n\n
\"... section must be designed to \u201cclose the deal.\u201d It must tell readers that their time has been well invested because this work can enhance productivity, increase understanding and decision-making confidence, or some other specific benefit(s). In other words, the authors must relate the value of their work to the reader\u2019s work. ... this must be done explicitly, and it must be done with authority and not with wild speculation. This section has to say to the reader, \u201cThis solution is important and useful to you because\u2026\" (Mahrer 2000). <\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"d68e07ad-220b-475a-b8d6-d6b36f3a5215","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":66.44880174291939,"y":83.87096774193547,"width":25.163398692810457,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f419dc90445.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"8c8b7ca8-2e72-4af6-940c-80d503497030","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":3.2679738562091507,"y":65.5141935483871,"width":17.429193899782135,"height":34.40860215053763,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"helpful","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f41a869c977.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":1200,"height":1200}},"subContentId":"213e92b7-ba0b-4e5e-9cca-51b7d4218295","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1370967741935485,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":19.354838709677416,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
EDITING - Sentences<\/span><\/strong> \u201cReaders are likely to feel that text is clear and direct when (1) the subjects of sentences name the cast of characters of the text, and (2) the verbs that go with those subjects name the crucial actions of which those characters are part.\u201d (Williams \"STYLE - Toward Clarity and Grace\") <\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"74384618-ea70-40d5-ba74-950de171b36d","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":"
Most would call sentence 2 clearer and more concise. Thisis because sentence 1 makes us sort out and then reassemble its actions through abstract nouns\u2014knowledge, determination,etc. The rearranging distorts the sequence of actions and obscures who does what. In 2, we have converted the abstract nouns into verbs, we\u2019ve made the actors the subjects of these verbs, and we have rearranged the events into a logical sequence. This is the essence of writing clear sentences.<\/p>\n\n
subjects = characters and verbs = their actions.<\/p>\n\n
Consider sentences 1 and 2 according to our model. No characters are visible in 1\u2014the subject of the sentence is lack.The action of the sentence is expressed by abstract nouns and the verb is precluded. Sentence 1 does not conform to the model, and it is confusing.<\/p>\n\n
In sentence 2, the characters of the main sentence and the subordinate clauses are we and planners which are also the subjects of the sentence and clauses. The actions of the characters are knew,determine, and allocatedwhich, similarly, are the verbs of the sentence and the clauses. Sentence 2 follows the model and is much clearer.<\/p>\n\n
The difference between 1 and 2 is how the writer tells the story, and where Williams locates his First Two Principles of Clear Writing: \u201cReaders are likely to feel that text is clear and direct when (1) the subjects of sentences name the cast of characters of the text, and (2) the verbs that go with those subjects name the crucial actions of which those characters are part.\u201d<\/p>\n\n
Other set: When verbs become nouns, thus deleting the characters, sentences become abstract. (Mahrer 2001d)<\/p>\n"},{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":25.739354838709676,"width":51.19825708061002,"height":73.11827956989247,"action":{"library":"H5P.MultiChoice 1.16","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"answers":[{"correct":false,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"Our lack of knowledge about local geology precluded determination of the planner\u2019s effectiveness in resource allocation to those areas of investigation with greatest potential.\n"},{"correct":true,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
Because we knew nothing about local geology, we could not determine how effectively the planners had allocated resources to investigate areas of greatest potential.<\/div>\n"}],"overallFeedback":[{"from":0,"to":100}],"behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"type":"auto","singlePoint":false,"randomAnswers":true,"showSolutionsRequiresInput":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false,"passPercentage":100,"showScorePoints":true},"UI":{"checkAnswerButton":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgainButton":"Retry","tipsLabel":"Show tip","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","tipAvailable":"Tip available","feedbackAvailable":"Feedback available","readFeedback":"Read feedback","wrongAnswer":"Wrong answer","correctAnswer":"Correct answer","shouldCheck":"Should have been checked","shouldNotCheck":"Should not have been checked","noInput":"Please answer before viewing the solution","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswerButton":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"
Which of these sentences is more clearly written?<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"6438d282-de06-4121-8b10-0e4d7949f72a","metadata":{"contentType":"Multiple Choice","license":"U","title":"Untitled Multiple Choice"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":55.55555555555556,"y":45.16129032258064,"width":42.48366013071895,"height":51.61290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.MultiChoice 1.16","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"answers":[{"correct":false,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
\u201cThere has been an affirmative decision for program termination.\u201d<\/div>\n"},{"correct":true,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
\u201cThe director decided to terminate the program.\u201d <\/div>\n"}],"overallFeedback":[{"from":0,"to":100}],"behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"type":"auto","singlePoint":false,"randomAnswers":true,"showSolutionsRequiresInput":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false,"passPercentage":100,"showScorePoints":true},"UI":{"checkAnswerButton":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgainButton":"Retry","tipsLabel":"Show tip","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","tipAvailable":"Tip available","feedbackAvailable":"Feedback available","readFeedback":"Read feedback","wrongAnswer":"Wrong answer","correctAnswer":"Correct answer","shouldCheck":"Should have been checked","shouldNotCheck":"Should not have been checked","noInput":"Please answer before viewing the solution","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswerButton":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"
Which sentence is more clear and concrete?<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"29d985b1-4afa-4949-b381-f256dbbb4220","metadata":{"contentType":"Multiple Choice","license":"U","title":"Untitled Multiple Choice"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.127015053763441,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":10.75268817204301,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
EDITING - Sentences <\/strong><\/span>Logical order.<\/strong>Turning verbs into nouns and stringing them through prepositions can confuse the sequence of events.<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"a642c1e4-8fbc-47a8-ac8b-c716f2cffd48","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":0,"y":19.327956989247312,"width":39.97821350762527,"height":79.56989247311827,"action":{"library":"H5P.MultiChoice 1.16","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"answers":[{"correct":false,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
\u201cAn evaluation of the effectiveness of the software by uswill allow determination if it offers an improvement in efficiency to our coworkers.\u201d <\/div>\n"},{"correct":true,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
\u201cWe will evaluate the software\u2019s effectiveness to determine if it can improve our coworkers\u2019 efficiency.\u201d <\/div>\n"}],"overallFeedback":[{"from":0,"to":100}],"behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"type":"auto","singlePoint":false,"randomAnswers":true,"showSolutionsRequiresInput":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false,"passPercentage":100,"showScorePoints":true},"UI":{"checkAnswerButton":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgainButton":"Retry","tipsLabel":"Show tip","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","tipAvailable":"Tip available","feedbackAvailable":"Feedback available","readFeedback":"Read feedback","wrongAnswer":"Wrong answer","correctAnswer":"Correct answer","shouldCheck":"Should have been checked","shouldNotCheck":"Should not have been checked","noInput":"Please answer before viewing the solution","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswerButton":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"
Which sentence has fewer prepositional phrases, making it clearer?<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"e029d0e4-7776-4e25-90d0-6e363d27dbfb","metadata":{"contentType":"Multiple Choice","license":"U","title":"Untitled Multiple Choice"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":42.48366013071895,"y":19.354838709677416,"width":56.31808278867103,"height":79.56989247311827,"action":{"library":"H5P.MultiChoice 1.16","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"answers":[{"correct":true,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
\u201cThe company committed an unfair labor practice when it closed the branch and transferred its business and nonunionized employees in order to discourage unionization and thereby obtain an economic benefit.\u201d <\/div>\n"},{"correct":false,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
\u201cThe closure of the branch and the transfer of its businessand nonunionized employees constituted an unfair labor practice because the purpose of obtaining an economic benefit by means of discouraging unionization motivated the closure and transfer.\u201d <\/div>\n"}],"overallFeedback":[{"from":0,"to":100}],"behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"type":"auto","singlePoint":false,"randomAnswers":true,"showSolutionsRequiresInput":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false,"passPercentage":100,"showScorePoints":true},"UI":{"checkAnswerButton":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgainButton":"Retry","tipsLabel":"Show tip","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","tipAvailable":"Tip available","feedbackAvailable":"Feedback available","readFeedback":"Read feedback","wrongAnswer":"Wrong answer","correctAnswer":"Correct answer","shouldCheck":"Should have been checked","shouldNotCheck":"Should not have been checked","noInput":"Please answer before viewing the solution","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswerButton":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"
Which of these sentence is clearer?<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"16e734f5-1e99-4e32-81e2-1da80c9247e4","metadata":{"contentType":"Multiple Choice","license":"U","title":"Untitled Multiple Choice"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":60.86021505376343,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":38.70967741935483,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
EDITING - Sentences Verbs and action.<\/strong> \u201cAction\u201d means more than physical movement; it includes mental processes, feeling, relationships, etc.  <\/span><\/p>\n\n
There has been effective member information dissemination control on the part of the consortium. <\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
The consortium has exercised effective member information dissemination control. <\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
The consortium has effectively controlled member information dissemination. <\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
The consortium has effectively controlled how members disseminate information.<\/em><\/span> (Mahrer 2001e)<\/span><\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"08bbb848-1877-48d6-8663-bc92a485acaf","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":"
\u201cAs we read a sentence, we have to integrate two levels of its structure: one is its predictable grammatical sequence: subject + verb + complement. The other level is its story, a level of meaning whose parts have no fixed order: characters + actions. To a significant degree, we judge a style to be clear or unclear according to how consistently a writer aligns these two levels. We usually feel we are reading texts that are clear, direct, and readable when writers consistently express the crucial actions of their stories in verbs and their central characters (real or abstract) in their subjects. We usually feel that we are reading texts that are gummy, abstract, confusing, and difficult when writers unnecessarily dislocate actions from verbs and (almost by necessity) locate their characters away from subjects or delete them entirely. There are details about these principles worth examining.\u201d WILLIAMS<\/p>\n\n
The following four-sentence progression becomes clearer as the verbs become more specific. Note also the improved clarity when the subject aligns with the character. Weak sentences use verbs not to express action, but to state that an action occurred. The crucial actions were not been or exercised, the verbs unnecessarily introduced in the first two sentences, but controlled and disseminate.Consider We conducted an investigation into the causes versus We investigated the causes. The first sentence exemplifies a common cause of unclear sentences: nominalization, whereby the action is expressed by a verb in noun form; e.g., discovery instead of to discover, movement for to move, etc. Too many writers use nominalization to make their text sound scholarly. In reality, all it does is obscure the action, disconnecting it from the character. Therefore, whenever possible, use verbs to express actions for clearer sentences.<\/p>\n"},{"x":0,"y":0,"width":100,"height":60.21505376344086,"action":{"library":"H5P.MultiChoice 1.16","params":{"media":{"disableImageZooming":false},"answers":[{"correct":false,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
\u201cThe more effective presentation of needs by other departments resulted in our failure to acquire funding, despite intensive lobbying efforts on our part.\u201d  <\/div>\n"},{"correct":true,"tipsAndFeedback":{"tip":"","chosenFeedback":"","notChosenFeedback":""},"text":"
\u201cAlthough we lobbied intensively, we could not acquire funding because other departments presented their needs more effectively.\u201d<\/div>\n"}],"overallFeedback":[{"from":0,"to":100}],"behaviour":{"enableRetry":true,"enableSolutionsButton":true,"enableCheckButton":true,"type":"auto","singlePoint":false,"randomAnswers":true,"showSolutionsRequiresInput":true,"confirmCheckDialog":false,"confirmRetryDialog":false,"autoCheck":false,"passPercentage":100,"showScorePoints":true},"UI":{"checkAnswerButton":"Check","showSolutionButton":"Show solution","tryAgainButton":"Retry","tipsLabel":"Show tip","scoreBarLabel":"You got :num out of :total points","tipAvailable":"Tip available","feedbackAvailable":"Feedback available","readFeedback":"Read feedback","wrongAnswer":"Wrong answer","correctAnswer":"Correct answer","shouldCheck":"Should have been checked","shouldNotCheck":"Should not have been checked","noInput":"Please answer before viewing the solution","a11yCheck":"Check the answers. The responses will be marked as correct, incorrect, or unanswered.","a11yShowSolution":"Show the solution. The task will be marked with its correct solution.","a11yRetry":"Retry the task. Reset all responses and start the task over again.","submitAnswerButton":"Submit"},"confirmCheck":{"header":"Finish ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to finish ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Finish"},"confirmRetry":{"header":"Retry ?","body":"Are you sure you wish to retry ?","cancelLabel":"Cancel","confirmLabel":"Confirm"},"question":"
Logical relationships.<\/strong> When turning nouns into verbs, you need logical operators such as because, although, and if to link sequences of clauses. (Mahrer 2001d) Which sentence is more clearly written?<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"b3a036ac-81b1-4b4f-af7e-5a9b15167ccc","metadata":{"contentType":"Multiple Choice","license":"U","title":"Untitled Multiple Choice"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.140455913978495,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":81.72043010752688,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
\"Compare this sequence of sentences. <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n
1. First, an active-verbal <\/strong>sentence: <\/p>\n\n
We investigated why the site retained so much unexploded ordnance after cleanup. <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
2. Next, recast as an active-nominalized <\/strong> sentence:<\/p>\n\n
We conducted an investigation into why there was so much unexploded ordnance retention after cleanup. <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
3. Further cast into a passive-nominalized<\/strong> form: <\/p>\n\n
An investigation was done into why there was so much retention of unexploded ordnance at the site after cleanup. <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
This progression shows a march from simplicity to obscurity \" (Mahrer 2002b).<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"b73258d6-48f0-4517-b587-6598c73083b3","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":"
Williams (STYLE Ten Lessons in Clarity and Grace, 6th edition, AddisonWesley Education Publishers) poses and answers three questions (i.e., guidelines) that may help.<\/p>\n\n
\u2022 Do your readers need to know who is responsible for the action? Use passive when you don\u2019t know who did it, your reader won\u2019t care who did it, or you don\u2019t want them to know who did it. Otherwise use active.<\/p>\n\n
\u2022 Which voice helps readers move smoothly from one sentence to the next? Readers have problems transitioning to sentences beginning with new or unfamiliar information. Frequently these sentences end with old or familiar information. Shifting to a passive verb allows reordering the sentence, putting old, familiar information first, allowing a smooth transition. This is the main reason we have the passive voice.<\/p>\n\n
\u2022 Would active or passive create a consistent and appropriate sequence of sentence subjects defining the characters on which your readers should focus? If in a sequential series of sentences you find yourself shifting randomly from one subject to another, or worse, you have no consistent subject, then decide about whom or what you want to tell your story. Then rewrite verbs to either passive or active to make the subjects consistent.<\/p>\n"}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":0,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":58.064516129032256,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
EDITING - Cohesive Paragraphs<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"Teachers, students, and the museum public have shown continuous interest in the Wiggle Monitoring Project. The functioning of the different ground motion monitoring stations in the first years of activity and the analysis of the first data recorded testify to the good quality of the data and the huge potential of this project for social and educational purposes.Scientists and researchers held discussions with teachers, students, and the public about the themes of research and the requirements for improved protection of the environment as well as disaster preparedness and mitigation. Finally, the constant support of local institutions helped us achieve the prototype monitoring network, while a number of national governments provided limited funds for meetings of teachers involved in the project on 1999 and 2000.\u201d<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n
(Mahrer 2001b, Mahrer 2001c)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"d08ae53d-b9a3-45b3-9d15-79e68d275d27","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":2.1747752808988765,"y":90.53833333333333,"width":35.1123595505618,"height":6.666666666666666,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f42763b5b8c.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"aad8ea0e-9874-4b63-b547-677570688cf1","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":76.25272331154684,"y":55.91397849462365,"width":21.624201748739793,"height":40,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"glue","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f428c41184d.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":299,"height":280}},"subContentId":"a2e11d99-a0db-4da2-99c0-3855b843eaa7","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":2.8089887640449436,"y":80.55555555555556,"width":40.02808988764045,"height":11.11111111111111,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Audio ends but recoding continues for another minute (blank) my apologies...<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"a09ffe3f-fab8-48ad-ab35-063864e32514","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1370967741935485,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":49.46236559139785,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
EDITING - Threads<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"Threads run through documents and hold them together. What are the threads? Simply, threads are topics. They are found by compiling, in order, the (grammatical) subjects of neighboring sentences and clauses. For example, if you underline all the subjects within a paragraph, this assemblage will group into topics. Easy-to-follow writing usually has one, two, or, at most, three easy-to-identify threads running through and, possibly, interwoven within the paragraph. Disjointed, hard-to-follow writing has more and, here, more may include isolated threads (i.e., a subject that lacks threading to preceding or proceeding subjects), or no, or very little discernable thread structure. Identifying and unraveling the thread structure of a document and adjusting to make it consistent can be an important editing tool.\" (Mahrer 2005b)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"8a23dad7-2a88-4224-9e57-e33b7251b461","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":81.69934640522877,"y":58.064516129032256,"width":17.161092028930167,"height":40,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"threads","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f428ef86be4.png","mime":"image\/png","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":1000,"height":1180}},"subContentId":"9827c85b-1976-4101-be6f-995b43588c2d","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.133737634408602,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":51.61290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Expecting to measure different speeds, in 1887 Michelson and Morley<\/strong> performed an experiment on light in different reference frames that gave null result. In terms of the physics concepts prevalent at that time, it was surprisingly difficult to explain these results; fundamental changes <\/strong>were required in the notions of space and time. Albert Einstein\u2019s special theory of relativity<\/strong>, which appeared 20 years the later and postulated the Lorentz Transformation, under which all <\/strong>laws of physics are invariant, was the necessary change. Differences <\/strong>in observations of the same phenomenon made in reference frames moving at different velocities are mathematically related by the Lorentz Transformation, which <\/strong>can be applied to rotating reference frames and reference frames changing velocity. A basic structural element <\/strong>of quantum field theory is Lorentz (transformation) invariance, and general relativity<\/strong> also includes Lorentz invariance through Einstein\u2019s equivalence principle: any experiment <\/strong>conducted in a small, freely falling reference frame is invariant.<\/span> (Mahrer 2005b)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"f0d0a514-80ae-4dda-8e24-dff4db74678d","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":72.98474945533769,"y":52.18086021505376,"width":25.925925925925927,"height":43.65591397849462,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"confusion","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f41e99a8891.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":1000,"height":852}},"subContentId":"6091d5ff-0208-497f-83b6-8a2b3d20c155","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":5.446623093681917,"y":81.72043010752688,"width":61.22004357298475,"height":8.602150537634408,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Compare this paragraph to the one on the next slide...<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"6e513218-d3b4-4ed9-bfcc-238f3ba5e9df","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1438172043010755,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":55.91397849462365,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
The 1887 Michelson-Morley<\/strong> experiment result measured the speed of light in different moving reference frames, expecting to see differences. Their result<\/strong>, a null result, was surprising and difficult to explain in terms of physics concepts prevalent at that time. The result <\/strong>required a fundamental change in the notions of space and time. The change<\/strong>, Albert Einstein\u2019s special theory of relativity <\/strong>appeared 20 years later.  Special relativity postulated that all laws of physics<\/strong> are invariant under the mathematics of a Lorentz transformation. Consistent with Michelson and Morley\u2019s null result, the Lorentz transformation<\/strong> relates the differences <\/strong>in observations of the same phenomenon made in reference frames moving at different velocities. It applies to rotating reference frames and reference frames changing velocity. Lorentz (trans formation) invariance<\/strong> is at the basic structure of quantum field theory. It<\/strong> is also included in general relativity through Einstein\u2019s equivalence principle, the invariance <\/strong>noted in any experiment conducted in a small, freely falling reference frame.<\/span>(Mahrer 2005b)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"4c62cc15-c357-466e-95ae-a1bb18a71eff","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":"
Lorentz invariance is not an easy concept; yet, this paragraph flows and can be followed. It maintains consistent threads. I have underlined the subjects with critical modifiers or other clarifying terms. Grouping them into threads shows thread 1: Michelson-Morley experiment, result, result; thread 2: change, Albert Einstein\u2019s special theory of relativity, Special relativity, laws (of physics); and thread 3: Lorentz Transformation, It, Lorentz (transformation) invariance, It, invariance. (The only subject left out of the thread groupings is differences and it relates observation to the Lorentz Transformation, which is part of thread 3.) The paragraph shows three threads that readily grouped, are consistent, and flow easily one to the next, even if the reader is not very familiar with relativity theory. Unlike the first example, the second example shows a complex topic presented in a reasonably simplified format. <\/strong><\/p>\n"},{"x":52.287581699346404,"y":88.17204301075269,"width":25.163398692810457,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f41e4fc8c97.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"},"subContentId":"9a7bcb83-c2d0-48cf-8ff0-c7eae1f19ef4"},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":86.05664488017429,"y":50,"width":13.071895424836601,"height":47.956989247311824,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"scientist","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f41eeb0d55f.png","mime":"image\/png","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":840,"height":1564}},"subContentId":"72870e15-913f-4b3b-a8c0-1c0573d8dc5c","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":6.535947712418301,"y":68.73655913978494,"width":46.84095860566449,"height":13.978494623655912,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Which one was easier to understand?<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"7bf8a75e-12d3-43ae-8073-5687d0ba46c7","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.140455913978495,"width":96.94989106753813,"height":55.91397849462365,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
\"As another exercise, try plotting the threads of something you found difficult to follow. Most likely, the subjects are all over the globe and they don\u2019t readily aggregate to threads. To make sense of this type of writing requires that readers bring a lot of their own information to fill in blanks created by the writer. If you don\u2019t have the background to supply the missing information, you will simply be confused and probably stop reading\u2014a fate writer\u2019s would rather avoid. Readers supplying the missing information is one reason why colleagues will say a manuscript\u2019s fine, but when you submit it to a journal, it comes back with comments about lack of flow, disjointed, poor organization, etc. Your colleagues are familiar with your work and fill in your blanks. The editors and reviewers at journals do not have that familiarity, may not recognize what information is missing, but do recognize something is missing. Remember editors and reviewers are representatives of the readers and have a sense of how typical readers of their journal will be disappointed with the writing.\" (Mahrer 2005b)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"8e60337f-f8e5-4384-b0af-7b58d8ec6452","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":68.62745098039215,"y":51.24989247311829,"width":30.174291938997822,"height":46.88172043010752,"action":{"library":"H5P.Image 1.1","params":{"contentName":"Image","alt":"knitting basket","file":{"path":"images\/file-61f41f587eb6f.jpg","mime":"image\/jpeg","copyright":{"license":"U"},"width":1024,"height":804}},"subContentId":"4f625fbd-172a-4100-9150-c7e7e17845bc","metadata":{"contentType":"Image","license":"U","title":"Untitled Image"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.150537634408602,"width":96.94989106753813,"height":94.62365591397848,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
EDITING - each task on the list gets one pass through the document, don't double up!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"1) Read your manuscript through without making any changes and ask yourself, \u201cWhat do I expect a reader to do as a result of reading this article? Does this manuscript really motivate a reader to do that?\u201d <\/strong> If so, great! If not, why not? What\u2019s needed? What must I add, drop, or modify to motivate a reader?<\/p>\n\n
2) If you feel a flow <\/strong>when reading, be skeptical and rigorously analyze if you have lost or are losing your objectivity toward this manuscript. Your manuscript is not your child; it\u2019s an object and you needn\u2019t love and protect it.<\/p>\n\n
3) Verbs are the most important part of speech in English. In each sentence identify the verbs and make sure they are as strong as possible<\/strong>\u2014a verb that dynamically identifies the action, makes a sentence explicit, direct, and easier to follow. Weak verbs\u2014those that require clarification with additional phrasing\u2014must be replaced. <\/p>\n\n
4) How far apart are the verbs from the subjects? <\/strong> Within most sentences, it is best if they are separated by about six or fewer words. Otherwise, you\u2019re asking readers to remember \u201cwho\u201d while throwing more facts at them without telling what \u201cwho\u201d did. Readers of English expect subjects to be near verbs; the farther apart, the more challenging the reading. Writing is a challenge; reading should not be.\" (Mahrer 2004c)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"d84d1c17-464e-4f82-adb9-285251bcdbb8","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":66.44880174291939,"y":92.47311827956989,"width":26.143790849673202,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f42b07df196.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"9343299a-4c30-44bf-8470-a2ae4ca4c087","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{"fillSlideBackground":"#dbfaf7"}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.140455913978495,"width":96.94989106753813,"height":94.62365591397848,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
EDITING - each task on the list gets one pass through the document, don't double up!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"5) Determine the length and complexity of sentences. <\/strong>We can debate long versus short forever, but one fact shines clearly: The longer the sentence, the longer the reader must wait to understand completely what you are saying. A short sentence gets to its point quickly; a long sentence doesn\u2019t. If you find that most of your sentences have, say, 20 words or more, a restructure is advisable. <\/p>\n\n
6) How is the information managed? Does old, known, or previously-discussed information precede new information (as it must) or vice versa, new before old? Remember we learn in context; introduce the context (i.e., old and known information) and transition into new information. <\/strong>Remember, what is old to you may be new to a first-time reader.<\/p>\n\n
7) Are transitions <\/strong>adequate or do topics end abruptly, followed by new topics without logically leading the reader from one to another? All writing is storytelling and all elements of your story must relate in obvious ways; we don\u2019t write mysteries!<\/p>\n\n
8) Are the subjects the characters of the actions and are the verbs their actions?<\/strong> If you preselected to write everything in passive voice, you may have fallen into this trap: The subjects and verbs may not be the characters and action. This can make your sentences unnecessarily clumsy. \u201cI\u201d and \u201cwe\u201d are acceptable in technical writing if \u201cI\u201d and \u201cwe\u201d are the doers of the actions.\" (Mahrer 2004c)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"3f2db7c2-3c51-4d1b-aa17-4418f24f5d45","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{"fillSlideBackground":"#dbfaf7"}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.133737634408602,"width":96.94989106753813,"height":66.66666666666666,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
EDITING - each task on the list gets one pass through the document, don't double up!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"9) Are the threads <\/strong>within a paragraph consistent? A thread is the topic addressed by the subjects of adjacent or near sentences and phrases. If you identify, say underline, all the subjects <\/strong>in a paragraph, they should all relate obviously <\/strong> to one or, at most, two main topics, i.e., the threads of that paragraph. If there are subjects that do not relate obviously to one or two threads per paragraph, most likely, your paragraph is rambling.<\/p>\n\n
10) Do many sentences end with propositional phrases? This type of structure, known as monotone, can greatly reduce the impact of your message. Try to end sentences, where possible, with impact statements, not prepositional phrases.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
11) Is there information in the main text body that belongs in an appendix<\/strong>? An interesting five-page paper with a 10 page appendix is far better than a meandering or cluttered 15-page paper.\" (Mahrer 2004c)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"efac2381-effc-48f8-a8d6-93f80864ac64","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{"fillSlideBackground":"#dbfaf7"}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.1438172043010755,"width":39.97821350762527,"height":77.41935483870967,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
PROOFREADING<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
General stragies -<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
1. Take a break, and read something else<\/p>\n\n
2. Slow down<\/p>\n\n
3. Read aloud, point to each word as you read <\/p>\n\n
4. Slide a piece of paper down the page as you read<\/p>\n\n
5. Read paragraphs at random<\/p>\n\n
6. Read the manuscript backwards<\/p>\n\n
(Mahrer, 2004b)<\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"4be06033-a368-47c3-b5bf-4fa2f80eac96","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":49.01960784313725,"y":6.431440860215052,"width":49.78213507625272,"height":90.32258064516128,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Personalized strategies<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n
\"1. Find the sentence (or two) that gives the thesis of your document. Can\u2019t find it? Then structure one into an appropriate place. Readers need this cue<\/p>\n\n
2. Locate the main or key point of each paragraph. If you can\u2019t find one, imagine how lost your readers are in trying to identify key issues. Fix it; restructure to include a main point sentence or statement for each paragraph<\/p>\n\n
3. Think of the most common mistakes you find in your returned manuscripts (e.g., sentence fragments, left-out words, run-on sentences, incorrect syntax, improper parallels, etc.) and go through sentence by sentence looking for one common error with each pass through.\" (Mahrer, 2004b)<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"0e3d2bd2-657f-4587-919e-ce8d5eddc5cb","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":11.982570806100219,"y":88.17204301075269,"width":29.52069716775599,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f42ab029689.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"2b3a0074-d42d-4ad6-b0f1-bd6295e9463f","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":0.4233870967741936,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":98.9247311827957,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Sample \"internal\" (self) due dates\/steps that I would set for a thesis - due to Jennifer McKee, Dr Cornwell and the thesis supervisor on Fri 8 Apr by noon<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
Week 1 (Jan 31 to Feb 4)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
1. Write out answers to the basic questions (who is the audience, what are the requirements etc)<\/p>\n\n
2. Write out a succinct, clear thesis statement. At this point you should also be able to title your paper with a provisional title - this helps with focus.<\/p>\n\n
3. Write out the purpose of the paper (remember, this is NOT the same as the purpose of the research)<\/p>\n\n
4. Write out the initial list of figures (which ones will be necessary to the success of this paper - be relentless in removing unnecessary figures)<\/p>\n\n
5. Write out the initial list of tables (relentless!)<\/p>\n\n
Week 2 (Feb 7 to Feb 11)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
6. Assuming that you have been doing a literature review all semester long, consider which papers BEST help the reader to understand how your work fits into the scheme of things (remember - the goal is NOT to impress us with your VOLUME here, but rather to LEAD the reader through to the main threads of your paper and its purpose and importance); write an OUTLINE for the lit review section (i.e. the Introduction)<\/p>\n\n
7. Make a tentative Chicago Style (Authour Date) end References list based on your lit review section<\/p>\n\n
Week 3 (Feb 14 to Feb 18)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
8. Write your Means\/Methods section. Remember - you don't need to bore us to tears with extraneous equations or a plentitude of details about stuff - use an Appendix for that<\/p>\n\n
9. Write an OUTLINE for your Results section and revise your figure and table lists accordingly. Add in the figures and tables with captions that detail WHAT the reader is supposed to get out of each one. <\/p>\n\n
Week 4 (Feb 21 to Feb 25) <\/strong><\/p>\n\n
10. Write an OUTLINE for your Discussion section, and then finalize the writing of your Results section<\/p>\n\n
11. Finalize your Discussion section, and then write your Conclusion section (remember - please - this is NOT a summary)<\/p>\n\n
12. Write your Abstract - 4 to 6 lines max. Be exacting - answer the abstract questions clearly and carefully.<\/p>\n\n
Week 5 (Feb 28 to Mar 4)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
13. Editing steps - leave several days for this, individual passes needed for many individual parts.<\/p>\n\n
14. Proofreading - leave several days for this.<\/p>\n\n
Week 6 (Mar 7 to Mar 11)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
15. Send draft to your advisor. Leave them several days to read it.<\/p>\n\n
Week 7 (Mar 14 - Mar 18)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
16. Plan time to make revisions - potentially major revisions - after your advisor has seen your draft.<\/p>\n\n
17. Re-do any\/all of the above steps as necessary<\/p>\n\n
Week 8 (Mar 21 to 25)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
18. Send draft to advisor again.<\/p>\n\n
Week 9 (Mar 28 - Apr 1)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
19. Re-do any\/all of the above steps as necessary<\/p>\n\n
20. Check in with advisor to see if he\/she has time to help you practice your thesis PRESENTATION<\/p>\n\n
Week 10 (Apr 4 - 8)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
21. Draft is due on Apr 8 - finalize details regarding thesis and thesis presentation<\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"4a82ff0c-219d-4c2b-ba98-d01314fe6b2e","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""},{"x":66.44880174291939,"y":68.81720430107526,"width":28.32244008714597,"height":5.161290322580645,"action":{"library":"H5P.Audio 1.5","params":{"fitToWrapper":true,"playerMode":"full","controls":true,"autoplay":true,"playAudio":"Play audio","pauseAudio":"Pause audio","contentName":"Audio","audioNotSupported":"Your browser does not support this audio","files":[{"path":"audios\/files-61f42992e0575.m4a","mime":"audio\/mp4","copyright":{"license":"U"}}]},"subContentId":"df3ba882-0424-46d4-aaa8-63d2b7f70e85","metadata":{"contentType":"Audio","license":"U","title":"Untitled Audio"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.140455913978495,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":94.62365591397848,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Week 2 (Feb 7 to Feb 11) continued...<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
7. Make a tentative Chicago Style (Authour Date) end References list based on your lit review section<\/p>\n\n
Week 3 (Feb 14 to Feb 18)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
8. Write your Means\/Methods section. Remember - you don't need to bore us to tears with extraneous equations or a plentitude of details about stuff - use an Appendix for that<\/p>\n\n
9. Write an OUTLINE for your Results section and revise your figure and table lists accordingly. Add in the figures and tables with captions that detail WHAT the reader is supposed to get out of each one. <\/p>\n\n
Week 4 (Feb 21 to Feb 25) <\/strong><\/p>\n\n
10. Write an OUTLINE for your Discussion section, and then finalize the writing of your Results section<\/p>\n\n
11. Finalize your Discussion section, and then write your Conclusion section (remember - please - this is NOT a summary)<\/p>\n\n
12. Write your Abstract - 4 to 6 lines max. Be exacting - answer the abstract questions clearly and carefully.<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"04764f7d-f80e-45b4-8da2-8d1909017c68","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.140455913978495,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":94.62365591397848,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Week 5 (Feb 28 to Mar 4)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
13. Editing steps - leave several days for this, individual passes needed for many individual parts.<\/p>\n\n
14. Proofreading - leave several days for this.<\/p>\n\n
Week 6 (Mar 7 to Mar 11)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
15. Send draft to your advisor. Leave them several days to read it.<\/p>\n\n
Week 7 (Mar 14 - Mar 18)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
16. Plan time to make revisions - potentially major revisions - after your advisor has seen your draft.<\/p>\n\n
17. Re-do any\/all of the above steps as necessary<\/p>\n\n
Week 8 (Mar 21 to 25)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
18. Send draft to advisor again.<\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"93647620-381c-4f58-b917-e1d998d42f74","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":1.0893246187363834,"y":2.127015053763441,"width":98.03921568627452,"height":75.26881720430107,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Week 9 (Mar 28 - Apr 1)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
19. Re-do any\/all of the above steps as necessary<\/p>\n\n
20. Check in with advisor to see if he\/she has time to help you practice your thesis PRESENTATION<\/p>\n\n
Week 10 (Apr 4 - 8)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n
21. Draft is due on Apr 8 - finalize details regarding thesis and thesis presentation<\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n\n
Remember - this schedule is a suggestion based on my writing experience. Your may choose to work on the sections in a different order. I highly recommend starting right away though - don't leave it until the last week or two! It is totally okay to work on more than one section at a time folks.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n\n
<\/p>\n"},"subContentId":"75c53f75-f12a-4954-881a-572b12150b01","metadata":{"contentType":"Text","license":"U","title":"Untitled Text"}},"alwaysDisplayComments":false,"backgroundOpacity":0,"displayAsButton":false,"buttonSize":"big","goToSlideType":"specified","invisible":false,"solution":""}],"slideBackgroundSelector":{}},{"elements":[{"x":2.178649237472767,"y":4.301075268817204,"width":92.81045751633987,"height":90.32258064516128,"action":{"library":"H5P.AdvancedText 1.1","params":{"text":"
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 1999. \"Why Manuscripts Fail.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 18(6): 724.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2000. \"The DSB Method.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 19(2): 162-164.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2000b. \"Bugged by Bad Writing? Help Break the Cycle\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 19(1): 86-87.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2000c. \"A Boring Test.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 19(7): 769\u2013770.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2000d. \"Too Many Chefs - An Allegory.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>,19(9): 1018\u20131019.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2001. \"Overcoming Yourself.\"  The Leading Edge<\/em>, 20(12): 1361.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2001b. \"Cohesive Paragraphs, Part 1.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 20(8): 839.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2001c. \"Cohesive Paragraphs, Part 2.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 20(10): 1128.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2001d. \"Clearer Sentences, Part 1.\"  The Leading Edge<\/em>, 20(5): 547\u2013548.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2001e. \"Clearer Sentences, Part 2.\" The Leading Edge, <\/em>20(6): 662\u2013663.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Permalink for The Leading Edge at LU<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n\n
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Mahrer, Kenneth D. 2002. \"Ask Yourself.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 21(2): 168.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D. 2002b. \"Active or Passive - That is the Question.\"  The Leading Edge<\/em>, 21(8): 762.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D. 2002c. \"How do you Figure?\" The Leading Edge,<\/em> 21(5): 458.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D. 2003. \"Writing Papers People Remember.\" The Leading Edge, <\/em>22(1): 37.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2004. \"Writing abstracts - A basic approach.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 23(12): 1246.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2004b. \"Proofreading your own work? Forget it!\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 23(11): 1130\u20131131.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2004c. \"Edit, don't Fiddle.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 23(9): 852\u2013853.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2005. \"K.I.S. or M.I.S.\" The Leading Edge<\/em>, 24(6): 592. <\/span><\/p>\n\n
Mahrer, Kenneth D., 2005b. \"The Threads of Writing.\"  The Leading Edge<\/em>, 24(1): 42.<\/span><\/p>\n\n
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Academic Writing at LU - The Undergraduate Thesis in Geography

Lisa Tutty